Let Me Fall

Is the title of a song sang by Bethany Joy Lenz in the Drama TV series, One Tree Hill. The first time I heard the song, I fell in love with it. It makes you wonder why right? Well, if by any chance you go on YouTube! and actually listen to the song, you will understand. It's not just about the music, the voice or the lyrics of the song. It's about the feelings portrayed in the song. The feelings that I felt as I listen to the song. The feelings that I once had, or maybe still have until now.

Everyone wants to grow up. I, for one, am a rebel. I am a black sheep of the family. The outlaw. The third child in a family of four siblings. When you are different, and you know it, it makes it even harder on you when everyone points it out to you. Not to mention when they are actually disappointed with you. Almost as if you are a defect. Like in the song, sometimes I wish everyone would just let me grow up, to let me feel the pain and sorrow that the world has to offer. To let me discover the world with my own two eyes and feet. Even if I fall, even if i die, at least I won't die with regrets. I have left my footprints on this world. The footprints, which says "Hey, I was here!".

The real world, reality or you may call it, can be cruel. To you, to me and to anyone out there. Facing the truth can be hard. Accepting it in your heart is even harder. Finding out that you are all alone in this world, the people that you love with all your heart don't love you back can be even worst. I, on the other hand, got used to it. Watching the people I love leave one by one, I got used to it. How? I stopped loving them too. That's how.

In the midst of it all, I discover that there is someone who will never leave you. And that will be God. My God would be Allah, since I am born a Muslim and thankful to be one. He's there all the time, watching, helping, listening. Most of the time, you and I forget about Him. When He never forget about us. A friend of mine once told me, if ever God forget about us, even if just once, then we'll all be dead. At first I don't get what he meant by that. But I guess it takes time for you to understand it. In your own way. To me, it was when my first love left me. I was devastated. My life ended right there and then. But somehow, I discovered someone else. And He gave me the peace of mind, the strength to go on and the dreams of the future which give me hope.

- MikoNazuhan

Life Changes....

.... like the four seasons. Time goes by, the earth continues to spin on its axis yet sometimes you felt as if nothing in your life ever changes. I have experienced a very life changing event in my life. The biggest event that should have change me forever... November is here and the leaves are falling yet I am still the same me. Although I have to say that sometimes you may loose things or gain something without even realising it. As they say, in order to gain something, you have to lose something. It opens up opportunities that I have never seen before. It allows me to meet and get to know people at a different perspective. However, I also lost my inner shine. The inner me. Sometimes, I wonder if gaining all these is worth losing the person I love the most in my life? To loose "Me" in the process?

Writing is a way for me to express how I feel. Writing is a way for me to put down my thoughts. By writing, I share the world my imaginations cause I have lots of them. Like scenes from a movie, it keeps on playing and playing. There are so much stories to tell, to share. Yet, where should I start? Where should I begin? When I read the words that I wrote, it reminds me of how I felt at the time. It comes back so vividly. Maybe happy or sad or even confused. Writing is my way of telling myself that everything will be OK. Writing is my passion. Writing is my talent. Writing is me. Writing is who I am.

Too bad I lost it when my love left me. I lost me in the process. Sometimes I wonder. Is it worth it?

- MikoNazuhan.

P.S. - This is just a random article that I wrote at the spur of the moment. It has no guild update what-so-ever...

Happy Eid Mubarak!

Hey Angels! Hapy Eid Mubarak and Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri to all Muslim Angels in the guild. Just got back from hols and now that I'm back in school, it is easier for me to surf the net compared to when I am living at home. and I have to apologize for missing out on the previous two GRBs. The wireless modem at home will be shut off by my father after midnight and since he placed it in his bedroom, it is impossible for me to sneak into the bedroom just to turn it on for GRB....

I had a really fun Eid Mubarak aka Raya this year. Most of my family members are back for the hols. My eldest sister came back with her husband and two-year-old daughter (this year but not yet) . Since she's living at Ireland, we could only see her once a year. Having a two-year-old child at home is actually surprisingly fun and exciting. I wish I had a daughter of my own. Lol. She is so smart for a two-year-old. English-spoken and knows pretty much a lot of words for a two-year-old. But then, it is kind of expected when a doctor got married to another doctor.... Basically I am the only one of my siblings who is not in the medical field.

• Eldest Sister = Doctor who got married to a doctor in Ireland.
• Second Sister = Doctor who got married to a Computer Specialist in Leeds, UK.
• Third Sister aka Me!!! = Applied Chemistry student going to be a Chemistry Teacher who just broke up with a Software Engineer...... o.O (Too bad..... Oh well!).
• Youngest Sister = Dentist Student-to-be in India. Also dating an engineer, I think......

Well enough about me. Lolololol. I hope everyone has a really great celebration this month of Syawal. Eid Mubarak is a one-month celebration. Lolololol. Have fun and talk to you guys soon.

-MikoNazuhan

September GRB Report!

Hah! It has been awhile since the last time I wrote a GRB report. In other words, it has been awhile since I actually joined in the GRB party. Lolololol. Oh well, straight to the report shall we?

Setting up my alarm and waking up at 2.40 am, I was actually pretty much excited and somewhat nervous. Not knowing why, I went on online to get the dread equipments from Nazu for Lil' Miko to wear. Commenting on the participation, all I can say is a lot of Angels turn up for GRB. And yes, its such a huge-front-page-news to me cause a few months ago, we used to have only 5-6 men party for GRB.



The event started out to be pretty slow and hectic on my part. Still learning the curve of the new strategy and sometimes I got confused with the commands given by Raul and Just, which included something like, "The rest of you follow Buter" (Am I the rest???) or "Miko, autojoin" (How?????). So most of the time I follow Fred's advice to stand back and watch. We did both portals, 1-15 and 16-30. This is my first time killing the mobs in 16-30. We used to do a lot of 1-15 mobs but I guess since we have lots of people nowadays, its time to conquer and divide. Lolololol.

The last 40 minutes turn out pretty well (or so they say). We were able to rake a lot of points i.m.o. which is around 16.3k points by the end of it. Although, it is pretty irritating to see the warning points collected by Eternity. They were able to get around 43k!!! Of course, they are ET (maybe they should consider renaming themselves as ExtraTerrestrial! Hahahaha). Oh well, enough about them (Not that I give a damn care about them and yes, I know they are Lighties and considered our heroes with the bless bla bla bla. I still think they are jerks).

Well, congratulations to all Eastangels who participated in GRB today and job well done. I wonder why my post today contained many monologues????

-Miko Nazuhan.

The Past, The Present and The Future

Is a somewhat suitable title to me as I sat down right in front of my lappy, with my fingers hovering close on the buttons of my keyboard, itching to write on the new post.

Why do I say so? It is because the Eastangels has grown so much over the year and I believed we have even celebrated our first anniversary without even realising. LOL. Oh well. Can't exactly remember the date myself. But I do remember that it all started with some harmless shoutouts in Trade Chat, calling out Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri by the Malaysian & Singaporean players in the game. LOLOLOLOLOL. In my case, the one who wanted to reply was actually my ex, Shah.

That's when I guess the Malaysian Singapoeran players gathered and decided to start a guild of our own, the Eastangels. We started out small, with very few number of players joining. However, our bond and friendship are very close because most of the earlier members are very loyal and active players. Some are still here, but most has gone (not dead! just they stop playing).

Climbing up the stairs of the Guild Ranking was not at all easy. We have went through so much hardship. And finally, now we are at no. 3! Yay! We are entitled for a Guild House of our own. Congratulations to all of the Angels who have worked so hard in GRB for making this to happen, no matter whoever they are, wherever they are and whenever the time was. I am very happy that despite being at no. 3, we have not grown to be as arrogant and pompous as any of the other Top 10 Guild (u know especially who!!!!).

Eastangels, where the Faithful belongs. Wondering what the future holds. Dreaming of the success we will achieve. As my fingers moving a whole lot slower, I guess it is time for me to go back to sleep. (What! Its 6 in the morning!)

- MikoNazuhan

From the ashes, We arise

Hello Eastangels! I have been missing everyone a lot... It has been two months since the last post. Thankfully the blog is not deleted... I am extremely sorry for going missing in action for so long but did the guild died during my absence??? If it does, then I am extremely sorry. Being in my final year, I am becoming very busy with my work (sometimes I couldn't keep up with the load) but i will try to find the time and make time again. I hope the Eastangels will rise back from the ashes. Will log on after this. (this week is my mid term hols so see u guys in the game) lol.

It has been awhile...

Hey everyone and I have to admit, it has been awhile. lol. New things and changes have been made in the guild since the recent events so its good to start with that rite?

First of all, by request to rest and some members leaving, new temporary Archangels (name bolted) have been appointed. So the new Archangels are:

• Rank 1: Sister-Miko

• Rank2: Punk5 (aka J); MeLur (aka Alma); Fate_Wan (aka Fate); Chamelion (aka Fred); Blizzeta (aka Blizz) and Babydoll (aka Baby)

Be reminded that the new rank 2s are temporary and your positions will be changed after further discussion or we think you do not suit the position. Unless, u can proved yourself to be a better Archangel than the previous ones, then u can keep your new positions. lol. I would like to congratulate all new rank 2s and of course, being an Archangel is a job. It is not just a rank since you are expected to work for it.

With the birth of new Archangels, new changes will be made to the guild with new rules and new events. So stay tuned for more.

- MikoNazuhan